the days go by, easy like sunday
I think that I could be depressed, maybe.
I feel frozen in carbonite like Han Solo. I’m constantly exhausted and emotionally drained. I’ve been eating crappy food and the only use my elliptical machine gets these days is for drying sheets. The term “comfort food” is misleading and devious but I just don’t feel like cooking, so breakfast cereal and Chinese take-out is easiest.
When I was laid-off in October, I definitely had an optimistic outlook. I’ve never had any trouble finding a job before. I had several job interviews every week until the holidays, and then the phone calls and emails slowly trickled down. Nevertheless, I was not to be discouraged, (everyone agreed that’s just the natural post-holiday slump) until Icon died, December 26. That was my tipping point.
I’m unemployed, single, childless, career less (yes, it counts twice) and 32yrs old! Although, I suppose it is very fortunate that I don’t have any dependents whose lives would be altered by these turn of events (or my pathetic inability to improve it). It’s just me.
I guess I am in shock that this isn’t getting any better.. How did I get here?
I desperately need some inspiration and motivation, but all I want to do is sleep all day. I feel like a hermit(!) I am at home all day, every day.
I miss Icon terribly. Blogging doesn’t hold the same interest without him even though I have lots of free time now. I really should get out more often…. Maybe I’ll walk through Independence Hall if the weather is nice. I love that section of philly.
I think kitten season is gearing up – and maybe I could use the cute cuddly furry tiny kitten lovies as much (or more) then they could use a foster home.
My intention was not to whine and complain about my life on my cat’s blog, but I started typing and it felt good… thanks for listening
It’s good to hear from you again, even though the circumstances aren’t the best. But it’s a good sign that you’re blogging again.
It’s been a rough stretch for you. I can relate… let me count the ways:
Laid off in 2008? Yep, September 17 was my last day.
Everything traditionally job-related dried up? Oh yeah, happened pretty quickly, too. (Being over age 50, probably faster.)
Lost a beloved cat in December? Sadly, yes…
First, I can say that Zoloft helped. I had been self-medicating with food, but this works better. It takes away the highs as well as the lows, but when the lows are overwhelming, like when Kelly was dying, it made it possible to function. Fortunately, there’s a generic version that’s cheap, since I didn’t have a prescription plan anymore.
Now I don’t need it. Up until maybe six weeks ago, I felt the same way you do about work. But I realized this fact: no matter what they tell you, it isn’t your fault you haven’t been hired. It’s a bad situation these days, and a lot of good employees are suffering for it, but as they say, “This too shall pass.” Like a kidney stone maybe, but it’ll pass.
As for work, Plan A went away, and plan B (temporary-to-hire jobs) wasn’t there either. Plan C was to get some piecework jobs online (I used odesk.com) and that helped my morale, and with the freedom of time, I volunteered for jobs I knew I’d like. A couple of days a week at the local library, and I just started with Tabby’s Place, a cat sanctuary a few miles north of New Hope (which seems appropriate). Read about them here.
Now I’m taking it one day at a time, and can say that today, all 3 proverbial keys to happiness are back in place: “Something to do, someone to love, and something to look forward to…” Hoping the same for you, soon…
I’m so sorry you are feeling sad. Icon was very special, and I still miss him, too! I like to think that he and Pixie are together at the Bridge.
I wish there was something I could do to help. I’ll bet if you got out and did a little something every day, you might feel a little bit better. Maybe you could volunteer somewhere, just to get out of the house and meet some new people? {{hugs}} to you.
Although we are natural healthcare providers, there are times when an anti depressant is called for. This is probably one of them. I’d check with a doctor. Find a way to make that consultation call fee because I suspect that will help a lot.
Some of this is time and certainly some of this is just because there isn’t a lot in your life right now to pull you out and keep you going with other stuff.
We are thinking of you and wish we could help you with that. Been there in many ways and hope that you will find your way back to something that makes life meaningful.
Oh, we are so sad to think you have been going through so much alone. Losing Icon was hard enough. We’re so glad you posted. No one can be there to listen or offer comfort if they aren’t aware of the problem. So, an occasional rant or whine is definitely appropriate for all of us. We know your blogging friends will be there for you, as best they can. There are undoubtedly many who can relate. Hang in there and don’t give up hope!
Oh, I’s so sad that you feels lonely. I misses Icon, too. Tha blogosphere doesn’t seem tha same now.
I’m sending you some purrs an kitty hugs, ok.
Love & Purrs, KC
Our Mommy is right there with you – we’re still here, but she’s in a pretty deep hole as well. Hopefully some new kitten love will help (of course nothing could take the place of Icon) see you through this rough patch. We’ll be purring for you.
Mom understands what you are going through, too!! Icon was a wonderful Cat and we miss him, too!! Our purrrrs and purrayers are with you!!
Your FL furiends,
My husband lost his job in december of 2007 so we can empathize with you. We adopted kintaro from a rescue group days before my husband was laid off and have just rescued a very young kitten the day before Easter. The two of them have bought much needed laughter to our home.
Getting out of the house to do something, anything is important. Interacting w/ others is important and you never know when you will run into someone that could know of someplace looking for a person with your qualifications. networking is very important to finding another job, especially now.
I will be praying for you and my 4 kitties will be sending some special purrs your way. Take care.
We are so sorry – we hadn’t even known that Icon died. He was such a foundation of the Cat Blogosphere, and we know about the loss of loved ones and it is terrible, just terrible.
Thank you so much for sharing your feelings with us, we really do appreciate it. Our maid has many friends in the exact same situation – only they are a bit older than you are. It is not easy, exercise and the outdoors do help if you could just manage to DO that stuff – which is the hard part when you are down….
And friends are very very important. And you have lots of friends here, in the Cat Blogosphere – so use us, keep sharing, and maybe whining once in a while, and listen to your cats – maybe even get a kitten.
Our staff claims we are the best help they can ever get in down times….
Karl, and The Cat Realm
Oh, our mom knows dat job stuff…imagine being 53 and trying to compete against 21 and 22 year olds who’ll work fur less money and put up wif all kinda stoopidity. Mom’s been doing a lot of stuff at da shelter, she feels needed der, heck, she is needed.
I truly understand what you are going through. I was out of work for 18 months after I got laid off. My husband was laid off for 23 months. I know the depression and desperation very well. I was 43 when I got laid off, it’s so hard. Oh how I loved Independence Mall when I lived in Philly! There’s so much beauty there. Please email me if you want to – I can share some of the things I did to keep motivated through the days I didn’t want to get out of bed until the afternoon, if at all. It’s hard to get past the bleak to see anything positive. Just know that we are all here for you.
MeezerMomMary
Being home all day alone leaded to depression especially when you do not have any thing to occupy your mind and hands. I have been there and continue to fight it. Medications do help. Getting out of the house and doing something also helps. I know you don’t feel you have the energy to get out, but you have to force your self. Just go to the library and read a book! Look for new things that interest you. Volunteer. Bring home a cat that needs love. It doesn’t have to be a kitten, there are lots of older cats that need homes. I know it is painful to think about loving another cat other than Icon. You can not replace him, but you can start to fill the hole in your heart with some other kitty.
You must take care of your self and try to pull your self up. We are here to listen.
What a rough year for you, and we hope that things will improve. Sitting around the house doesn’t help when you feel that way,mum has been through that last winter and getting out and going for a walk, especially in the spring or summer helped so much.
Is there anywhere close to you that could use your skills? Even your blogging skills could help a shelter or nursing home with stories about residents.
Thanks for sharing, we know it is tough reaching out, but we all understand how you feel and wish you the best.
Big hugs
Julie and Poppy Q
You have really been having a tough time of it. Go ahead and tell us all about it whenever you feel like it. We are here to listen and help, if we can. I agree with the others who have said that making yourself get out of the house and taking on a volunteer job will help you get through the days. You never know when you might meet someone who knows of a job somewhere that you could apply for.
First of all BIG HUG!! This is a really tough and scary time all around. Please don’t take it personally, this is just a really hard time economically.
Depression stinks. Trust me, I’m an expert. I absolutely hate the fact that I have to take Prozac but it really does the job and helps me immensly. I hope you might try an anti-depressant, they really do work!
Finally, if you EVER want to get together for some coffee or something or even have a companion to visit Independence Hall I would love to meet up with you! The city can be very invigorating, I walked around on Saturday night and there was so much life and it was rather inspiring.
I understand about depression, too.
I’ve been on Zoloft for several years – and it does help!
That doesn’t mean I still don’t have some ‘down’ times, though.
Getting out can be hard, I know – it’s so much easier just to stay inside. But get out if you can. Feel the sun on your face. Maybe walk to the library.
Volunteering is great, too.
Wish I could do more to help, but know that you’re not alone.
We are sending you (((hugs))) and (((positive vibes)))
Our purrs and prayers to you.
Maybe being a shelter volunteer would feel good – Mommy found that it helped her feel better at a bad time in her life and a lot of kitties benefited from her being there.
We miss IBB – he was a wonderful kitty.
xoxoxoxoxoxox
We are all sorry that things are not good for you now, helping at the shelter or fostering may be just the ticket to help you along to brighter times. Our Mum’s Mum used to say that the best way to help your self was to help someone else. We know it isn’t always possible to do that when you are down, but we hope that a little sunshine soon finds its way to you, to warm your spirit.
Large rumbly purrs and hugs to you
Whicky & Family
We are so sorry to hear about your depression. Our Maw has it too and takes medicines for it year round. Has for many many many years. She knows that it’s so very hard to force yourself to get out and do things because the depression gets too deep. Yes, it’s very hard to get up and get out of the house. And being stuck inside without work to pull you out can be hard too. Maybe Independence Hall could help you out. Maybe a walk in the park. If you can get out there. It is hard. Hang in there.
We miss Icon desperately also. He was a great Man Cat!
Hugs and many purrs,
Us and Maw